Letter № 6 · from Reginald, Harrogate

On the Cat

Dear S., — A creature has been installed in my house. It is small, it is silent, and it has been given the high places: the ledge above the warm box, the summit of the soft cliff, the sill from which it regards me without expression. It doe…

Letter № 5 · from Bella, Cotswolds

On the Dressing of Spaniels

Dear S., — My Mistress dresses me. There is, on certain occasions, a small woollen jacket the colour of an apologetic emergency. There is, on other occasions, a green Barbour-style coat that flatters no one. There is, on Christmas Day, a th…

• fashion
• household
• indignity

Letter № 4 · from Dylan, Welsh Hills

On the Retired Life

Dear S., — There are, in the field opposite, forty-two sheep. I have counted. I count them every morning, as a courtesy. I am not permitted to attend to them in any other respect. The Master — formerly a working farmer, now what he calls "r…

• work
• purpose

Letter № 3 · from Iris, Brighton

On the Coat

Dear S., — I have been issued a third coat. It is a *"puffer."* It is, I am told, "for me." I have not asked for it. I have not, in any of my deliberate movements, suggested I require it. And yet, when the door is opened, on it goes. I do n…

• weather
• fashion
• indignity

Letter № 2 · from Murphy, Cumbria

On the Diet

Dear S., — I am told, with increasing frequency, that I have had *"enough."* I do not understand the word. There is, in the bowl, no more. There is, in the cupboard, plenty. There is, in the world, an injustice the scale of which I cannot a…

• food
• household
• indignity

Letter № 1 · from Boris, Hampstead

On the Postman

Dear S., — There is a postman. He approaches the house with a small bag of paper. I have made my displeasure known, daily, for two years. He continues to approach. What is to be done?

• duty
• neighbourhood